A major challenge in optical quantum processing is implementing large, stable interferometers. We offer a novel approach: virtual, measurement-based interferometers that are programed on the fly solely by the choice of homodyne measurement angles. The effects of finite squeezing are captured as uniform amplitude damping. We compare our proposal to existing (physical) interferometers and consider its performance for BosonSampling, which could demonstrate postclassical computational power in the near future. We prove its efficiency in time and squeezing (energy) in this setting.